


Good Things Don't Come Easy

by Annide



Series: 911 Weeks [16]
Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Asexual Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV), BuddieWeek2020, Coming Out, M/M, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-20
Updated: 2020-09-20
Packaged: 2021-03-06 21:22:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,272
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26115631
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Annide/pseuds/Annide
Summary: Eddie couldn't fall for someone like Evan Buckley, but the heart hardly ever listens to logic.
Relationships: Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV)
Series: 911 Weeks [16]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1808203
Comments: 12
Kudos: 156





	Good Things Don't Come Easy

**Author's Note:**

> Written for Buddie Week Day 1: "Oh no... he's cute" + fluff

When Eddie decided to become a firefighter, he expected there to be a few bumps, and there were. Even once he got assigned a firehouse, he knew it wasn’t over. He was joining a team that had probably gone through a lot together, a family that might’ve lost members before. He expected some push back, he expected it to take time, and most of all, he expected there to be at least one person in particular who he’d rub the wrong way just by being there.

What surprised him though was the fact that the reason that one firefighter in particular didn’t like him was because he looked too sexy. He never really understood that. Of course, he knew he looked good and people enjoyed staring at him. He knew he was an attractive man, that was something he could feel, but he never really grasped the concept of sexiness. He used to think that meant something was wrong with him, the way everyone used that word with such ease, the way it clearly meant something specific for them. Just like he used to be confused by how much they talked and thought about sex. He still remembered how broken he felt that everyone else around him seemed to feel things he never experienced. But that was a long time ago. Eventually, he’d learned what asexuality was and all of these things had started to make sense.

The nickname Chimney, however, didn’t make sense to him, but it was alright. He knew eventually, when he’d earned the crew’s trust, they would share that story with him. In the meantime, Hen told him about the firefighter calendar and Chimney explained later that they picked no more than one candidate per station, and Buck really wanted it to be him. He felt threatened by Eddie, because he looked really good, but he also had more experience. Buck had been a firefighter longer, but Eddie had been in the army, that made him insecure.

Eddie wasn’t discouraged by Buck’s attitude toward him. He stayed nice and friendly, let the door open for friendship. It may not have been a day yet, but Buck wasn’t warming up to him, it even seemed like he purposefully made an effort to dislike him. Eddie tried to bridge the gap Buck was building between them, being mad at him because he was too at ease there already, but it didn’t seem to work. This first day was already proving to be some kind of a challenge. Eddie wasn’t letting it get to him however. Things would work themselves out eventually, he couldn’t force Buck to like him.

As he’d thought, that problem fixed itself out. Nothing like dealing with a bomb and risking your lives together to make two people finally see eye to eye. But that came with its own inconvenient. Without Buck’s attitude rebutting him, Eddie could see him better for who he really was. That wasn’t good. It started small. First, he told Buck he could have his back any day and Buck replied that it could go the other way too, stumbling just a little bit around the words.

“Oh no... he’s cute.” He thought.

Things only went downhill from there. Just their next shift, Buck mentioned loving children and already Eddie was falling hard for him. He himself had never been much for children. He loved Christopher and that was it. And dating as a single parent wasn’t exactly easy. But there he was, sitting across from a man who not only loved children, but was also kind-hearted, smart and good-looking. Buck was everything he could ever hope for. There was just this one problem. Buck had a reputation, for sleeping with lots of women.

The women part wasn’t the problem. He had a feeling a little of Buck’s reticence to get close to him at first also had to do with attraction. There’s was this kind of discomfort he felt that he could see reflected in Buck, like they both shared something, a desire to get to know each other better and a fear that the other wouldn’t reciprocate. Eddie suspected maybe his history with Shannon might be what stopped Buck from making a move, but he very much thought they both liked each other.

Time passed and Eddie only grew more certain of it. Whatever he felt for Buck, he wasn’t the only one feeling it. And that scared him. Because there was no future. All of this could only end one way, their burgeoning friendship would be ruined. Buck was waiting for him to make the first move, laying out all the hints that he was interested and available, but still under the impression Eddie might not be into men. Eddie wanted nothing more than to prove him wrong, but he couldn’t be with someone like him, he could never make a relationship work with someone who enjoyed sex so much. He could never keep up and Buck would be dissatisfied with him.

“Ok, Eddie, you have to tell me. What’s wrong?”

“What?”

“Things have been so good lately, but you look bummed about it.”

“I’m not... What do you mean?”

“I don’t know, we were getting close, it’s comfortable between us. But you don’t seem pleased about it, like it bothers you for some reason.”

“I... I do, I just... I feel like you might want something I can’t give you.”

“I don’t understand, I would never ask you for anything more than you’re comfortable with.”

“Buck.” Eddie took a deep breath. He’d never felt more nervous before. He wasn’t even sure he could do it. He’d never said the words out loud before, he’d never told anyone this until now. He’d tried and he’d wanted to, but the words always stayed stuck in his throat, leaving him with as much regret as relief. “Buck, I’m asexual.”

“Ok. So I guess you have thought about us dating then.”

“Buck, I’m serious. I don’t have much of an interest for sex. I mean, I guess it does scratch an itch sometimes, and it can be a nice way to please someone I care deeply about, but most of the time I’d rather keep my clothes on and cuddle.”

“I don’t see the problem here. I love cuddling.”

“You love sex. I’ve heard the stories. I could never be enough for you.”

“My relationship with you is more fulfilling than any amount of sex I could ever have. Besides, that was the old me, the one who was young and stupid and didn’t understand what real intimacy is.”

“Buck, are you sure? Because this isn’t ever going to change.”

“Yes, I’m sure, Eddie. Can I kiss you?”

“As often as you feel like.”

“Well, that might make it difficult to work, but we’ll figure it out.”

Nothing warmed Eddie’s heart like the grin that appeared briefly on Buck’s face before their lips finally touched. Part of him was still afraid, still convinced he was just putting his heart out in the cold where it could only get hurt, but part of him felt more at home than ever, safer than he could’ve imagined. He wrapped his arms around Buck, wanting to feel him close.

They spent the evening watching a movie on Buck’s couch. Eddie and Christopher sat on either side of him, their heads on his chest, each with one of his arms around their shoulders. Eddie held one of Buck’s hands in his, playing mindlessly with his fingers, happy to have him. He wanted a thousand more nights just like this one and now he might actually get his wish.


End file.
